tubthumpin

annual dinner was good. won a nice prize by coming in 2nd for the video we made (it might make it up onto youtube sometime). it was good to get the high and rush from a do-or-die environment of organising, eating, and going on stage at the same time. good kind of tired.

a significant outcome of the weekend was the acquisition of the "smoking gun" data needed to make a decision to excise a particular relationship. flee temptation as they say.

perhaps it will be necessary to change tack a little bit and to resurrect that "teaser" side, the chatty and game extrovert, unafraid of being the occasional ass and "inviting yourself" to things. of course the best relationships are the ones which go deep. unfortunately, those involve some amount of digging. props to the ones who have pried me open successfully, occasionally with a crowbar. i hope the rewards are worth the while.

maybe its just me, or are the people here (or is it work?) just too "disinterested"? they seem to be perfectly happy with the little circle they've drawn around themselves, and are willing to pick up on the inconsistencies, the interesting shit, the anomalies, the flips in texture of reality. unfortunately its hard to get along with the interesting people, cos they're either too busy working, have issues, or are just plain assholes, or all three. trust me, i know =p

its the one-year anniversary. some people say that it takes this amount of time to get used to the reverse culture shock. but it doesn't really feel like it. what there is is a sense of alienation, as you are now fully cut-off from your old surroundings but floating as some kind of foreign particle in a new petri dish.

back to work tomorrow. it's been pretty attritional, and not all of it very uplifting. oh well where are the ECAs and the hot chicks???